I have been praying very hard for my son as he gets older, seeking God in the various places in his life. But I may have been praying the wrong prayers at times even though my heart was in the right place…
I heard a woman on the radio the other day that really shook my way of thinking. I don’t think it is wrong to pray for blessing and success, who doesn’t want that for their children? That in mind…success isn’t given to you on a platter. It is earned. You feel the pain and sweat on your brow of the hard work placed into something when you count yourself successful in it. You fall on your face at times and get back up a little stronger as you grow. Successful things take time & take work & experience. Similarly, a deep relationship doesn’t happen overnight. It is cultivated over time through time spent on the relationship. My son won’t find himself with a full relationship with Jesus if he never experiences the sting of life that drives him into the arms of the One Who Saves!
My prayers need to be less “protection” focused and more “potter” focused if I truly desire to see my son come to know God in a more intimate way. As a parent that is terrifying, to be honest. But if I claim to have faith in God that He can do all things, then I need to be willing to know and trust that He can guide and mold my son. It takes success and failure to mature. I can’t protect my child from every rejection and potential of failure and expect him to grow into the mature gentleman that God desires to build him into if I don’t trust God to do the construction in his life.
Sunday in the sermon we heard the comparison of people to a wild stallion in how we must be broken at times to grow and to draw closer in our walk with God. Our self focused desire to be in control must be broken before we learn to taste and trust the hand of our savior. If we rely solely on our own strength and merit, then we don’t realize that we NEED Him. He must break that part of our will in order for us to delve deeper into Him.
If I desire for my son to have a deep, meaningful relationship with Jesus then I must realize that I can’t rescue him from the trials of life he is meant to endure. I admit, that is scary but I totally believe it is true. My prayers need to become ones that surround asking God to have full control of my son’s life and to give me strength and courage to trust that God is in control in each aspect. That I will seek His will in how I approach each aspect of parenting with a cloak of prayer so that my actions are spirit led which will help me allow Him to remain in the lead. And that I will trust that in all things, including the failures and trials, that God is crafting my son into the amazing man He plans for him to become. Lord give me courage and guidance.
So…my prayer is this: that my son be given the experiences that God desires him to encounter so that he brick by brick becomes the man that God desires and plans for him to be. Even those breaking moments that it tears at a mother’s heart to witness. That in the process he will grow closer to Jesus and have a deeper understanding of the call God has on his life. And that I will have the courage and strength to trust God fully in every aspect to guide me and comfort me with reminders that He remains in control and to know exactly what my role is as we go through each day as his parents. Because one day we will look up and see a man before us rather than a teen boy…and my heart’s desire is that this man will have a deep relationship with Jesus and will know exactly who he is in Christ & what he’s called to do.